Eternal Living in a Temporal World

I've been waiting a long time to write this post -- almost a year now, in fact.  There have been many times that I considered writing, but then decided that I should wait until things were more perfect and my life was more settled.  I have since concluded that such a day will never happen, so here is the raw story from my heart -- a story I've needed to share for a while.

For months, Jeff and I prayed for direction.  We were fairly settled in Ohio, but felt God stirring us to head east.  After months of prayer and job searching, nothing happened.  We still felt God moving us east, but there were no jobs to be found.  All prospects led to disappointing dead ends.  We finally decided to take a leap of faith.  It wasn't the first time we made such a bold move, and I'm sure it won't be the last.  By this point, I was pregnant with our fourth child, and God was clearly telling us it was time to move.  Jeff gave his notice at work and we started packing.  Jeff's company in Ohio then offered him an opportunity to work remotely.  In essence, he would still be able to work for them, but we could live in NH.  I praised God for this huge answer to prayer.  But then, on Jeff's last day of work, his boss told him that the deal was off.  I remember driving to the lake in St. Mary's, sobbing, crying out to God.  Why would He allow this?  Our one hope was snatched away from us two days before we were scheduled to move.  Then, on the day of the move, through what some would call a good coincidence, but what I believe was God's divine providence, Jeff's boss called him and said the company was desperate for Jeff's help and perhaps they could work something out.  To make a long story short, Jeff started his own company working out of my parents' basement as a consultant.  However, it soon became clear that this could not be a permanent solution.  His new job took him away from us for weeks at a time, and the lack of a routine was not benefiting the girls.  We were greatly blessed by the opportunity to stay with my parents, and they were a huge help during my last months of pregnancy.  I can't imagine spending those days and weeks alone.  God definitely had a reason for that time there.  Once again, we thought we had things figured out, and made plans to find a home in NH, but doors kept slamming shut.  They weren't just closing -- they were slamming!

Finally, the Lord provided a job in Bangor, Maine, about 3 hours away from my family.  I could write a novel of the many ways God clearly made His will known in the unsettled days leading up to our move.  I don't always understand why certain things happen, but when I look back, I can see His hand and know for certain that His ways are most definitely higher than mine.  I would have done things a whole lot differently if I had my way months ago.  I am so glad that I followed His way instead of my own.

And that leads me to my most important point.  As a young girl, I asked Jesus to be Lord of my life.  It's not just that I believed in God.  Lots of people, even Satan, believe in God.  It's not just that I believed the Christmas story.  A lot of people still believe that.  But, I invited Him into my heart, making Him the center of my life.  I'm sure, as a child, I had no idea of the crazy road of life I would travel and how I would need Him to direct every single step.  But today, I am positive that I would not be able to survive in this crazy world without Him.  There can be no other explanation for how everything fell into place surrounding our move to Maine and the birth of our son.  In the month before the move, Jeff was once again away from the family, living in a motel.  We weren't happy about the arrangements, but it was during that time that Jeff was able to connect with Bangor Baptist Church, a source of huge blessing to us during this period of transition.  The people there were willing to help complete strangers.  Not only did they find a doctor for me when no one would take me at 39 weeks pregnant, they watched our girls when I went into labor, they helped unpack our house, they helped with doctor appointments, and they provided meals and lots of encouragement.  Having a relationship with Jesus doesn't mean that things will be perfect or even easy in this temporal world.  Instead, we should be focused on the eternal and know that He is always in control.  No matter how crazy my life may seem here, I pray that, through it all, I can let Jesus shine through me, giving glory to my heavenly Father.  It is because of Him that I can have true peace despite the earthly uncertainties.

Within a span of three days, we moved and had a baby.  While I was thinking that these were not ideal circumstances, I was reminded of how my Saviour was born 2000 years ago.  When I look at the precious face of my newborn son, I think of how Mary must have felt gazing upon baby Jesus, the Kind of kings and Lord of lords.  And then I think of how perfectly God loves us, His sinful children, that He would send that precious Baby to die for us.  It's a love that we humans cannot fully understand, but we completely reap the benefits when we fully surrender to Him.

I don't know what the future holds, but I know Who holds my future.  Isn't that what really matters?